6 Tips for Writing Your First Email to a Therapist
Your First Step to Therapy: Crafting a Clear and Quick Email
Reaching out to a therapist can feel daunting, especially if you’re unsure of what to say, how much to share, and how to format your message.
Yet, knowing how to email a therapist for the first time can help ease your nerves and set you on the right path toward finding support.
This blog will walk you through how to write an email to a therapist, taking the guesswork out of the process. No need to spend time spinning your wheels on the perfect sentence when what you’re really seeking is individualized support and connection!
This post includes examples of what to say and tips for other important communication with your therapist, including how to break up with your therapist via email if necessary.
How to Email a Therapist for the First Time
Therapists prioritize real-time connection and attunement in their sessions. Since they often have limited time to respond to emails, your initial outreach should be concise while still conveying the necessary information.
When sending an email to a therapist for the first time, your main goal should be to request a consultation or first session.
Here’s a simple example of how to email a therapist for the first time:
Subject: Inquiry About Therapy
Body:
Hi [Therapist’s Name],
I hope you’re well. I’m reaching out to inquire about setting up a consultation. I’m navigating [brief mention of your concern, e.g., anxiety, life transition, relationship challenges] and would love to learn more about working with you.
Please let me know your availability for a brief consult or the next steps in the process.
Best,
[Your Name]
[Optional: Your Phone Number]
What to Include in Your First Email to a Therapist
Greeting: Start with a friendly and professional tone.
Purpose: Share that you’re interested in working with the therapist and briefly describe the type of support you’re seeking.
Availability: If you have scheduling preferences, mention them.
Contact Information: Include your name and preferred contact method.
What Not to Include in Your First Email to a Therapist
Extensive Personal Details: Avoid sharing confidential information or a detailed life history.
Urgent Requests: If you’re experiencing an emergency, it’s best to contact a crisis line or seek immediate support rather than emailing a therapist for the first time.
Why Keep It Brief?
Due to confidentiality concerns, most therapists are bound by HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) and cannot discuss in-depth client information via email. Additionally, therapists often limit their email communication to logistics to maintain boundaries and protect their time.
As a therapist who’s been in private practice for five years, I can confirm that I do not hold on to or evaluate initial contact emails. I utilize the phone consult and initial intake to see if we’re a good fit, and I almost always forget what someone wrote in their initial email.
How to Follow Up
If you don’t hear back within a week, it’s okay to send a polite follow-up email:
Subject: Following Up on Consultation Request
Body:
Hi [Therapist’s Name],
I hope this message finds you well. I’m following up to see if you received my previous email about scheduling a consultation. Please let me know if you are available.
Best,
[Your Name]
How to Write an Email to a Counselor
The same principles for emailing a therapist apply when emailing a counselor. Here’s a slightly different example tailored to counseling:
Subject: Request for Counseling Services
Body:
Hi [Counselor’s Name],
I’m reaching out to explore counseling options. I’ve been facing [brief overview of your challenge, e.g., grief, work stress] and would like to learn more about working with you. Please let me know if you have any availability for a consultation.
Looking forward to hearing from you.
Warmly,
[Your Name]
How to Break Up With Your Therapist: Email Template
Ending your therapeutic relationship can feel uncomfortable, but there are ways to do so respectfully. Ideally, you should share your intention to end therapy during a session.
However, if emailing is necessary, use this template:
Subject: Transitioning Out of Therapy
Body:
Hi [Therapist’s Name],
I hope you’re well. After some reflection, I’ve decided to pause or end our therapy sessions as I feel ready to [reason, e.g., apply what I’ve learned, pursue a different approach].
I’m deeply grateful for the support and guidance you’ve provided during our time together. I’d appreciate any recommendations you may have for the next steps or resources as I continue my journey.
Thank you again for everything.
Warm regards,
[Your Name]
When to Consider a Termination Session with Your Therapist
Consider scheduling a termination session if you’ve been in therapy for six months or longer.
This provides closure, allows you to reflect on your progress, and helps you leave on a positive note.
While it might be awkward and feel scary, this is the time to practice those things! You’ve invested time and resources to get real-time exposure to things that scare you outside of the therapy room. Use this as an opportunity to address your desire to end the relationship in real-time.
Your therapist will most likely offer you a termination session, which is also worth it! This is like a healthy breakup experience.
You’ll get to reflect on your growth, your connection with the therapist, and where you’re going.
These are beautiful sessions that you deserve to experience.
Common Questions About Emailing Therapists
1. What should I do if I don’t get a response?
If you don’t receive a reply after a follow-up email, consider contacting another therapist. They may be full or unavailable.
2. How do I reach out to a therapist if I’m nervous?
If emailing feels overwhelming, remind yourself that therapists are used to receiving first-time inquiries and will understand your hesitations. Keep it simple and direct.
3. Can I cancel therapy via email?
Yes, but it’s best to provide your therapist with advanced notice. Whenever possible, discuss cancellations in a session.
6 Tips on How to Email a Therapist for the First Time
Keep It Short and Simple: Aim for a brief, clear email without unnecessary details.
State Your Purpose: Clearly mention that you're seeking therapy and briefly describe your main concern.
Include Your Availability: Mention any scheduling preferences to help streamline the process.
Avoid Sensitive Details: Remember that email is not fully secure, so keep personal information to a minimum.
Be Respectful and Patient: Therapists may take time to respond due to their busy schedules.
Follow Up, If Necessary: If you don’t receive a response within a reasonable time, send a polite follow-up email.
Knowing how to email a therapist for the first time or how to break up with your therapist via email can make the process less stressful.
By keeping your emails concise, respectful, and clear, you’re more likely to establish a positive connection with your therapist or counselor.
Remember, your first email is simply the beginning of your therapeutic journey, not a make-or-break moment.
Whether you're asking how to email a therapist for the first time or how to end therapy, hopefully, these templates help you navigate the process with a bit more confidence and ease.
More notes on therapy:
Julie Goldberg is a licensed therapist and the founder of Third Nature Therapy. Her practice focuses on helping individuals better understand their inner world, befriend their nervous system (instead of working against it), and navigate changing relationships. She offers somatic therapy, EMDR intensives, and Ketamine-Assisted Psychotherapy in Brooklyn, NY.